Not a diet blog

I was watching a dieting programme on the TV the other night. Because there's nothing I like more than slumping in front of the TV at the end of a long day watching absolute drivel. This one was the one where they match a thin person and a fat person and make them swap lifestyles. There's a handsome male doctor and an attractive lady doctor to help them on their quest. Every programme is exactly the same and has a psycho-babble bit in the middle where handsome male doctor has a serious chat to the fat one or the thin one who is struggling with their commitment to the quest and uncovers secrets from their past which have contributed to their current state of fatness or thinness. Once this titbit has been revealed and explained to the grateful victim, they inevitably go forward armed with this knowledge and beat their eating / non eating demons. The fat one always loses 3 stone and the thin one always puts on about 7 pounds. I'm totally addicted to it and feel as proud of their achievements as if I hadn't spent the entire programme nipping into the kitchen for another biscuit.

Well, I've had a bit of a life long battle with my own weight, tending as I do towards the strapping end of the spectrum. From time to time, I reach a point where I decide Something Must Be Done and religiously stick to the current fashionable diet for three or four months and lose 2 or 3 stone. Then over the next year or so put it all back on again.

So, I thought, having just reached the SMBD stage once again, I'll give myself a handsome doctor talking to to see what dark secret in my background has given me an addiction to stuffing my face.

Why do you eat ? (me, talking to myself)

I like food

Why do you like food?

I'm always hungry

Any other reason?

I want to treat myself

Why?

Because it's fun and because I'm bored

OK, well let's look back at your childhood. What was that like?

Hmm, well, we were quite poor. We had very boring plain food. There was no money for treats. When we did have treats, it was always food related. Christmas dinner, Pancake Tuesday, Easter eggs, ice cream sundaes on birthdays, bonfire toffee on bonfire night. And those occasions were always fun. So in my mind, eating is associated with fun.

Hey, it's clever this isn't it? I'm fat because I like having fun. Oh.